Helping your child feels reassured

We all dreamed about having a happy child who is calm, dynamic, and voluntary but in the same time thoughtful and composed.

However, the reality happens to be different, in spite of all the good will in the world.

Your child happens to be restless, irritable, having difficulty to concentrate or falling asleep, and the list goes on…Two questions that come to mind: why and how?

Why do I have to ask her/him constantly to remain calm?

How can I help her/him?

“Speed devours everything, it’s like taking a blurry picture”  (Elena Ferrante)

by Sandrine Verdier

We are now living in a time where the world is continually accelerating. From an adult point of view, we see the effects of that wether they are negative (pressure, stress, having the feeling that we won’t be able to finish our “to do list”, discouragement…) or positive (excitement, sensation of living a full life and make different experiences..).

I encourage you to discover the documentary film Tout s’accélère from Gilles Vernet on this topic. A very interesting documentary film that shares the opinion of pupils from a primary school. 

There is an inevitable conflict between the pace of a child’s life and the imposed pace of a school or parent’s schedule..etc. They are not fully responsible of this choice.

The rythme of childhood is slower than the one that has been described earlier.

Children take their time: to contemplate, to watch, to try, and to start again. Children need to understand the world they live in.

Desynchronization is one of the reason they are having trouble to remain focused and calm. 

 

They are aspiring human beings full of uncontrollable emotions. Unfortunately, it sil be completely non sense to hope that they will find all the answers by themselves.

There are some other reasons responsible of the continuous agitation:

  • High consumption of industrial goods with high sugar level
  • Being often exposed to screens
  • Agenda filled with various activities with no time to rest.

In short, our children get hurt by this modern society and our way of life.

Unsplash, by Patrick Fore

What if we took our time…? 

Well, what do we do now once we said that? The good news is that nothing is lost with children. They can adapt so fast and embrace the changes.

As parents, we are supposed to initiate and accompany the changes so they can get all the information they need.

This is what you could do to return to tranquility:

  • Going outside in the nature. Nature suspends time. It’s the perfect place to observe, contemplate and understand the world we live in.
  • Practicing mediation with them. Thanks to famous people like Christophe André, meditation is becoming more and more popular in France. It is a sauce of virtues for children. You will be able to witness an improvement of their concentration. This will allow them to have greater influence on they world. I recommend you Eline Snel‘s bookCalme et attentif comme une grenouille. You and your child will discover guided meditation and all the benefits thanks to the CD.
  • Practicing yoga while having fun from 18 months. You could go to some workshops (cf website Fédération Française Yoga Enfant), but you could practice at home as well. Read the book from Elodie Garamond and Lise Bilien called Zen, un jeu d’enfant  which is full of information and organized depending on their age. And there’s a CD too. 

“Cool parents make happy kids”  (Richard Templar)

Changing habits is really complicated, but those different methods will help all the family to be more zen!

We have so much to learn from our children. So for a moment, let’s apprehend the world like they do.

by Sandrine Verdier

 

 

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